Just Thinking.....

I am guessing almost no one reads my blog, so I am not as afraid to post this... but I always had this question at the back of my head. This is a little off topic about what we are talking about in class now, but I was always curious about this. So my question/ realization is this: There is now talk of a woman possibly in the future being president. This is a HUGE deal in the United States, but anywhere else in the world (for the most part), women have been president. Why is this?! And I had many guesses to why this may be, but I would like to ask someone who knows a lot about women studies, or some other subject that could help analyze this question. Women are capable of being president, so what is wrong with the United States? I just found this article about this question... http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/04/19/60minutes/rooney/main1513207.shtml < That was from a 60 minutes episode, and one of the things in the article talks about the population dealing with the reasoning behind not having a female as president. There are more women in the world than men... so he suggests that women aren't voting for women. I can see how this could be a good reasoning, but at the same time I disagree. There are many women who probably don't vote, and many in the world don't know a lot, or don't care enough about politics to vote. So then that already decreases the number of voters anyway. Although times now are changing, men have been the ones who were more educated, so very few women could vote... making the number of voters even lower. Of course now, more women have become educated and are becoming more part of the government, so I am sure that the time for a women president will come soon. But I just thought this was an interesting thing to think about. And I am glad to know that other people in the world have thought about it too!

Tan or White?!

Tan or white? This is a question some women ask themselves everyday. Women in the United States, who are white, want to be tan. Women in other countries around the world who are tan, or dark skinned want to be white. So here our world revolves around women not liking themselves. I do understand that as women, we like to be as beautiful as we can, putting make up on everyday and wearing nice clothes. But I never got the idea of tanning to look more tan. At the same time, since I was not born in the United States, and I am not white, I can't judge. I was born in Peru, so my skin is naturally tan. When I was younger, I didn't realize how "different" I was. I remember guys always asking, why are you so tan? And my explanation was that I was out in the sun all the time. It never occurred that being born in another country made my skin that way it was. As I grew older I learned how great my skin was. I love being tan.. and maybe part of that reason is because all of my friends strive to be as tan as I am. During the summer, the competition for all my "white" friends is to see who can get as tan as me. Being more tan is a big deal here, and I take for granted how great being tan is. Personally, I don't think much about my skin color, as you might have guessed from telling the story about when I was younger, not even realizing why my skin color was different. So when my friends all tell me, " I wish I was more tan", I hesitate because I don't know what to say. I tell them that they have great skin, but then they tell me how jealous they are of my skin. This came up in a conversation we had last week about people not feeling right in their own bodies. So here I am combining the need to be tan, and people not feeling comfortable in their own skin...that didn't mean to be a pun. On the other hand there are people who are darker skinned that strive to be white just like people from the United States. There is white cream that people can buy to make their skin whiter. This is because those people think white gets you more things, which is true in this society, but at the same time I feel bad that people have to resort to this. One student had said when she was in India, she saw this poor woman selling balloons, and once that woman got some money, instead of buying food, she bought whitening cream. This just shows how important it is to be white in the other countries. So my question to everyone, is why is it so hard for us to not like ourselves? I know there are some people who do love their skin, but a majority don't, and I feel that this should be changed. We don't want to all be the same person because what is the fun in that? We need to different, because that makes up who we are as a person. Now then there is also the aspect that white skinned people have more privileges, which makes my question hard, because all the darker skinned people want is to be more noticed, and live better. So my question also can't be answered. I personally love my skin, and don't want to change it. But my appreciation for my skin came over time, and I think if others learn to love themselves, that is a huge step towards a better future.

Latina TV

Today was a presentation about Culture and Media Culture, and for this we had to read different articles about different races, and how they are represented in culture. The first article was about the TV show Ugly Betty and Latina TV. The Ugly Betty series finale was this past April, which caused not only an end to a great show, but an end to a show with two Latinas as prominent roles. These days many of the main roles of TV shows are mainly "white people's" roles. There are shows and/or movies who have Latino or Latina/Hispanic people in it, but usually their characters are described as the stereotypical view of Latinos/as. These views are slutty, fierce, or spicy women. The ones who are able to steal the husbands away from the wives because of their looks. And Latina women are seen a lot for their bodies, because they are tan, and very curvy. One TV show that shows a Latina as a slutty role is Santana, in Glee. Santana is a cheerleader who is dating this tough "bad ass" guy, which really just means that she is having sex with him. Then there is Desperate Housewives, where there is Eva Longoria is married to a Hispanic/Latino male, but has affairs with other men when her husband isn't home. Now, this show is about women who have flings and affairs, so maybe she is a Latina/Hispanic woman in a white woman's world, doing all these things too. It could go both ways. That brings me to another topic that we talked about in class. When you see Latina/Hispanic women dating a guy, it is most likely a Hispanic/Latino man, when shown on television. But if a Hispanic/Latino male dates someone, it doesn't have to be in the same race, but can be other races. I thought that was really interesting to learn about. This is a side note, but I was born in Peru, and so I do look Latina. I have traveled to Spanish speaking countries, and many times when people see me they start talking to me in Spanish. I do understand some Spanish, but I am far from fluent, so when they find out that I don't speak Spanish they are surprised and then sometimes I feel like they are disappointed as well. I do want to learn Spanish well, and I am slowly in the process of doing so, but it was a different feeling that I had to deal with, because these could have been the people I grew up with. My mom always tells me that once I get into the "real" world that things might change for me because I am Latina. And when I was younger, I didn't understand what she meant, because I thought I was just like everyone else, with just more tan skin. But now I understand what she is saying. Because I am a Latina women, in some cases I might not have as many opportunities in places where people don't know me, because one look, and they will start making stereotypes. I think the Ugly Betty article was a great one to read because it showed how TV has started to change, but still limits certain races playing roles. Or if there are they go along with the stereotypes that the media has shown the public about those certain races.

Girls and Marriage

It is interesting to see on TV shows or movies how the girl is taken away so a suitable man can be chosen for her, or the parents just set up marriages for their daughters. I have seen this in two things just recently. I am a huge fan of Gilmore Girls. I love the tv show, but have just recently become a fan, as in the last two years. I have seen all the seasons a number of times now, and since recently I never realized what it would be like to be one of the friends of one of the main characters. One of the main characters, Rory, has a friend, Lane, who is Korean, and Lane's mother is always setting her up on dates for possibly future boyfriends/husbands. Lane is a good daughter, and respects her mother's Korean ways, but wants to be able to pick her own boyfriends and be in a rock band, which would be unacceptable, so she hides who she really wants to be. She had no choice on who she could be with, because her future boyfriend/husband had to be a "future doctor. " It was really stressed in her family that she would only be with one guy for the rest of her life. Her mother was only with her father, and waited to have sex until marriage, and even then it was said she didn't do it much after that. I know that this is a different culture, but it was interesting to me that this TV show showed this, in a time where times have changed. I am glad they did because it is another perspective that girls can see. I know a lot of girls or women can't imagine what it is like to be forced to marry someone, because (especially now) women are allowed to be with whomever they want. They can choose whether they want to be married, or just focus on themselves. A movie that goes along with this is Shrek. I know it is a young children's movie, but I was watching it while babysitting and it showed how the girl has to wait for her Prince Charming to come and rescue her, and that will be the one whom she will marry. And so this girl has to wait in a building away from everyone else, with a dragon guarding her, so that her Prince Charming will come and save her. It seems in a way that girls should only wait for that one guy that they will spend the rest of their lives with. And it is true that girls, wait for that one guy, but they must have experiences before they meet that guy. It is good to have other relationships to know what you like and what you don't like. I know that arranged marriages were common years ago, but I couldn't imagine being put with a man, who I don't like, and he might not like me either. We would have to get married and act like we like each other, and I am sure after a while, we would get to like each other more but that initial shock of having to be with someone with the rest of your life that you have no connection with is scary. So I just thought I would point out those observations I had on those two TV shows/movies. And how we can see that it is still taught that girls should wait for that one person to be with for the rest of their lives, even though it seems that doing that is getting more rare, at least in the United States.

Racism

Racism has been around forever, and will continue to be a part of our everyday lives no matter what. People may think that they aren't racist, but everyone is. As bad as that sounds, we all are, because we all have been persuaded by the media, and our parents. It is true that some people may be less racist than others, but no one person can say that they aren't racist. I remember during the Soap Box Speeches that was weeks ago, one of my friends went up and talked about racism. She is African American and opened with, "Today I found out that I was racist." At first I laughed at that, but soon realized that it was true. She explained that because it was always told that white people were racist against black people, it never crossed her mind that things could go the reverse way as well. She had made a white person joke one day, and realized that that was racist. I know for myself, I try to be careful with what I say out loud, but I catch myself about to say or thinking something racist and realizing how bad that is. It is true that some things aren't as bad as others, but it is still racism. The class before Thanksgiving, we talked about racism and oppression. Over the years we, as a country have become more accepting of different races. Even when talking about racism I am guessing that most people think of African Americans, because of the Civil War and slavery. We forget that there are other races in which we can be racist of as well. But since the civil war was more recent, there is still outburst of racism against African Americans in the South states. Because the South was where most of the slavery was held, because the North made them get rid of slavery, they still hold grudges against the Blacks. Now I don't believe there is a lot of places that still segregate, but I am sure there are towns that blacks would be best to stay away from. In an article we were given in class from the New York Times, called Our Racist, Sexist Selves, it talked about this man finding out he was racist. There was a test that a person could take in which a person encounters a series of black or white men, holding guns or cellphones. The person's job is to shoot the gunmen and holster their gun for others. The outcome for this man was that he shot armed blacks in an average that was slightly faster than he shot the armed whites. THis example shows that even when we least expect it, everyone can be somewhat racists.

Roles in Relationships

Traditional vs. Egalitarian families. Years back, families were known as traditional families, but as time passed, they have evolved into egalitarian families, with some traditional influences. I think this is a great change for the society now, because women are allowed to do more things, such as getting an education, to finding a good paying job to support their families. The presentation said that about 71% of women work outside of the home now, which is a huge number from when women were only thought to be stay at home mothers. No matter how society has changed, it seems that the men want to still remain somewhat in charge. We got on the discussion of if the wife makes more money, what does that mean for the husband? Some men can accept that, and others won't hear of it because then they aren't the ones who are providing for their families. I remember someone saying in class that their mother made more money than her father, and the mother wouldn't tell her husband how much she made, because she knew it would upset her husband. So it seems in some instances the man might feel ashamed if they aren't the dominant provider of the family. I never thought about this too much in depth before, but looking at my family, my mother was the main provider for a number of years. She worked in NYC, and would stay down there half a week, so my dad was the stay at home dad taking care of my brother and I. I guess I knew this was somewhat different, but I never thought that much of it. And in how things turned out, I am glad that for most of my life that my father was around. Not because I didn't like my mother, but it gave me the chance to be close with my father as well. If my mother hadn't been away, I think it would be harder for me to share some things with my father that I do now, or things we do together. It was a great relationship builder for me. This is not to say that I don't have a great relationship with my mother. I do, she has now retired and is at the house all the time, still making some money, but my father now has a job too. I never thought to ask my father how he felt about my mother going out and making the money for the household, but I think having this "switch" of roles, was a benefit for all of us, especially my brother and I. My father seems very happy to be working and earning money for our family now, and with his working I don't get to see him as much, but the way I was brought up, I wouldn't have it any other way. I got the best of both worlds. So back to the traditional versus egalitarian families, mine is definitely egalitarian. Both of my parents cook, and clean. My mother does most of the cleaning in the house, and my dad does most the outside work, but they also do work inside or out together, so there is some traditional influences.

The Curse

I think it's funny how many names or words are associated with a girl's period: "the curse", "it's her time of the month" , "I got a visit from Aunt Flo", etc. When the sex education group did their presentation, the movie that they showed was about a girl getting her period for the first time. She thought it was "the curse" and if I remember correctly wasn't that fond of it. But when she first told her mother about it, her mother was so happy for her. The daughter had now become a woman. Along with growing up, there were certain things that a girl was limited to when one had their period. This movie wasn't present day, but it was interesting to see what the teacher taught to the girls in class about their menstruation cycle. The teacher stressed how important it was for the girls to look their most attractive selves when having their period. And I think I also recall a girl asking if other people know when they are having their period. The answer was no. I disagreed with some of what the teacher said, but that's just my opinion. Anyway, so if the teacher said that no one knows when a girl is on their period, wouldn't people guess something happened for a week, that the girl is much more "attractive" than other weeks in the month? I would think so. So it seems that they do want the boys to know, possibly, that the girls are having their period, because why would they tell the girls to look more attractive when they have it? Another thing I thought was funny, especially compared to now was a sign the teacher had, about the "Do's and Do Moderately During Menstruation". The things to do are showering or bathe, wash hair, swim, dance and picnic, and the things you can do moderately included skating, horseback riding, fast games, and square dancing. I think these are really funny because of what we can do now. I guess I understand that they didn't want anything to get too out of hand, or push anything, but you can dance, just not square dance? Their choices of what they should do moderately compared to what they are allowed to do are interesting choices. Another thing that was said in the movie was that a girl getting her first period is the first step of becoming a mother. That is such a huge statement, saying that girls are only meant to grow up to become mothers, nothing else. I know that this was 40 or some years old, so that was how women were portrayed, but in today's society, that would be a crazy statement to hear. Today, I am glad, that women have the right to get an education, and work just like men. And as much as menstruation cycle can not be fun, it's must happen. So hopefully it won't be a curse to all, just a reminder that we are growing up.

Sex Education

Sex education is a topic that has become more popular among these generations only because there are so many teenage pregnancies in the world. When growing up, I never had a sex education class, but in my health class, one of the topics was about sex. At the beginning of this groups presentation, they showed a video about this girl who wants to become older faster, and be just like her older sister. It shows how she tries on her sister's make up, and then a couple weeks later gets her first period. Her period meaning she has now become an adult woman. After the first period starts, the next thing mothers are concerned about is when their daughter, or son, starts to have sex. I think it is probably less concerning about the sons, unless he gets a daughter pregnant, but even so, in the long run, the man doesn't necessarily have to take care of the child, as bad as that sounds. The daughter if she gets pregnant has 9 month ahead of her, and then she has the child, so it seems like it's a greater worry for mothers of daughters who start to have sex. Abstinence is one of the teachings of sex education, and parents, even the government are realizing that abstinence isn't working as effectively as they want it to. Teenage girls are becoming pregnant more often, because they aren't told how to be safe, if they try it, which most teens have, or anything else. Because of teens becoming pregnant more and more, there are TV shows about it, Teen Mom, 16 and Pregnant. Society is realizing what is happening, they are starting to address it, and it is more accepted than it would have been years ago. The government is now giving more money to schools to help those schools have more sex education classes for their students. It seems that having these classes in school, will help the students. Many students are too scared to talk about sex with the parents, so then if there is nothing offered in school, that student is on their own in figuring out what to do. Some of the students in our class even said that they never had "the talk" with their parents or if they did, it was really short, and uncomfortable. So then, if daughters are getting pregnant should we partly blame the parents? More schools aren't teaching abstinence, because they know that most teenagers will be having sex, so rather than tell the students that sex is bad, or they should wait until they are older, or married to have it, the students should be taught how to have safe sex. I think the government has now realized this so that is why they are giving schools more money to try and prevent further amount of teen pregnancies.

Gender And War

Last week's group talked about gender and war, which I think has become a growing issue among our lives today. We were split into groups and each had a different gender and war conflict to discuss. My group talked about how it was a big step for women to become suicide bombers. This was for a couple reasons, one: because no one thinks about women willingly giving up their lives. and two: because war or killing is usually done by the men, not the women. Even now that women are allowed in the army and allowed to fight, it doesn't mean that they are fully considered equals in the army. Women are still limited in doing some things in the army, as in being in the front line. This is because women aren't as strong as them men, and so in times of battle, if men are wounded or killed, and people are needed to drag the bodies, the women aren't strong enough to do that. Hence why they aren't allowed to be at the front of the line. Another topic about suicide bombers, whether men or women, is who convinces these people to kill themselves as well as many others around them. I know for myself, I cannot imagine one day strapping a bomb to my stomach, knowing I was going to soon be gone from this world, and along with me the people who are around me, when the bomb goes off. Taking such an action that would go in the news depending on how much damage I did, would make me remembered in a small way. But it is hard for me, to think of doing this, as I said before. Then again, it might be hard for us, here in the United States to think of killing ourselves, but some people are really committed to their country and their religion. Not saying that no one here does, but I think its a different aspect then here. True, the people who go off the war are risking their lives as well, but I believe there is a difference, because any one of the troops that are sent over seas have a chance of living, while a suicide bomber is going to die, no matter what. So back to the the female suicide bombers, I think that the women are showing the men, and other women in the world, that they are just as capable of doing what men can do. This was a step to "equal" ourselves in a way, but is it such a good thing to want to do? That is for each of us to decide!

Human Trafficking

Tuesday's class brought the first presentation of the year. And it was really interesting, but such a sad topic. I couldn't imagine having to research human trafficking without feeling so sad and almost sick inside. This topic is so powerful and so unbelievable that is lead to a great discussion about prostitution in class. We started talking how girls in third world countries are more apt to be put in prostitution than girls from the United States. Except if girls go abroad to travel and then they are taken that way to prostitution. When this was mentioned it made me think about a movie I had watched that dealt with teenage girls from the United States who went traveling overseas. Once they two girls landed, they met this guy who said that he would help them travel, but instead he lead his friends to their house and take them away. The movie was called "Taken". Once the two girls were captured, they were sent to a whore house to make these men more money. It was so sad that they got taken away to be drugged and then put in prostitution. The girl's friend, like many many other women or children in the world, didn't make it out of the house because she was so drugged up to be a prostitute that it wouldn't be worth saving her because she was so gone. I can't imagine being those daughters who are sold into prostitution to help a family get money for the rest of the family. I guess I kind of understand that a family needs money, and so the daughter should help in anyway she can, but selling her for prostitution is such a bad experience for the daughter. The daughter is at risk with so many things, the biggest is her life. The presentation was very informative about prostitution, and with the game, like candyland, showed how hard it was to get out of prostitution, without being hurt in some way.

David Radcliff

The other day in class, David Radcliff was able to come and talk about what he does. I was really glad that he came in to talk because I wasn't able to attend his presentation on campus earlier. What he does seems really interesting, and he experiences so much. Being able to travel, and see how people live, and from that try and help make women more equal, for example. He seems to run into many situations where the wife in a marriage gets beaten by her husband. He gave us the example of this Guatemalan woman that he met. She told him that she would have left her husband a thousand times if she could, but will not because her children. And to her, her children are more important, so she puts up with her abusive, cheating, and alcoholic husband. I couldn't imagine being in a situation like that, but it just makes me thankful for the place I live in, and that much more admiration for women who have been put in these situations, and are able to still see what is important, and not get discouraged. One of the groups Radcliff pays more attention to are the women, and this gets more and more interesting to me the more we talk about woman, and their equality. Many places woman are treated with no respect, or inferior to men. In many countries, girls are sent to the sex trade because of the family's economic shape. It is a horrible experience for the daughter because, they are put through the trade, and then when or if they finally are able to get out of the trade, they are scarred, and will not have "normal" lives. In one place, a company or organization is willing to give a family a piglet, if they don't sell their daughter into the sex trade, because when that piglet grows up, it will be worth the same amount as if they family gave up their daughter to the sex trade. And this way, the daughter is sparred from all the horrors of the trade that they would have to face. Two things that Radcliff said really stuck with me, because they were so powerful, and nothing like society here in the United States, especially where I live. One of the sayings was - "to be born a daughter is a lost life" To me that is such a hurtful, unfair sentence to women, or girls. It's almost as if the better thing to do, was if you can figure out what gender it is at a certain time, why not have an abortion, so those parents won't be disappointed. I know that is a little too far, but I feel that's how those people feel. I am sure they will care for their daughter, but at the same time, I am sure that daughter's life will not be great especially when certain situations come around where a son would have been better suited for the job. The second is who is the "boss" throughout the woman's lifetime. First her boss is her father, then when she gets married, she must listen to her husband, and then once her soon becomes of age, around the teens, she must listen to her son. Can one imagine how you can never think or act on your own, because you will always have a boss making those choices for you. I couldn't imagine it, and am glad that I don't live in Nepal, but am curious about how the women themselves feel there. I am sure just because our cultures are so different, that they aren't as upset about it as I would be, but I wonder if they just accept it because that is how it is, or if they like it.

Revolutionary Road

I recently just finished the movie Revolutionary Road. I don't know if anyone else has seen it, it has Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet, one of the first movies they did together after Titanic. The two are a young couple trying to live during the mid 1950's, and how they deal with their problems. During the movie, the two decide to move to France, and "start" a new life, one that can be more exciting than their lives now. One of the main reasons they choose France, is that DiCaprio, as the husband, went to France, and loved it. He would love the chance to go back, and figure out there what he should do with his life. So the two agreed that this would be a good idea, and that the wife, Winslet would be working, bringing in the money to allow them to live in France. To me that seemed reasonable, especially because I know in my family, my mom worked in the city, so she traveled down each week, and would stay until her work days were done. That meant that my dad took care of my brother and I, and I didn't think anything of that. But this is out of the norm of society, true society has been evolving and it has become more acceptable, but especially for the time period the movie is set in, choosing the wife to go work, while the husband stays at home was strange. And to show how strange it was, there was a scene in it, showing the couple telling their best friends/neighbors that they were moving to France, and about what they plan to do there. Upon hearing this, their friends were supportive, but then when the couple left, the neighbors started to talk more about it. The neighbor husband, didn't believe that DiCaprio and Winslet would actually go through with the plan because it was so crazy. He said something like, I can't see the man staying home and not doing anything, while his wife works... his wife is suppose to stay home. And then the wife agreed with him, saying the wife should stay home. I understand that this was more the norm back in time, but just because of the generation I live in now, it is hard for me to think of not being able to go to school, and college, and having to stay at home all day, cooking, taking care of the children, waiting for my husband to come home. I don't think I could do that at all. This was a great movie, very powerful, but one can really see the gender differences in it. There are other small things about women too, such as Winslet was pregnant with the third children, and she kept saying how she didn't want it. How she wanted to have an abortion, and that they should do it before it gets too late. I know even now abortion is a huge controversy, so the fact that it was brought up in this movie, and it was the woman's idea to have it, made the movie more interesting. Especially because the norm is women should always want and care for children, and if they don't, it looks like something is wrong with them. I am glad I got to see this movie, but now i notice that the more I watch movies or tv shows, I really look for gender differences.

Princess Boy

On Colleen's blog, she showed a video of the family who has the boy who likes to dress up, and how the parents, teachers, etc feel about this situation. I thought it was really interesting to hear the different views because of they boy wanting to dress up. The interviewer at first asked the mother how she felt about the situation and it seemed that she was more concerned at first, not knowing what to do, or thinking that he needs to change. And then the interviewer asked the father what he thought about the son's situation. The father was very supportive of his son, and saying that no matter if he continues to want to dress like girls, or its a phase, he will always be there to there for his son. This was really interesting for me because the mother seemed more concerned about her son fitting into society, and worried about it him. It seems that she has accepted it more now, but I feel like whenever there are situations such as this one, that the father is the parent that is more concerned about the son, wanting him to grow up to like sports, and be tough. The fact that the father was more accepting of it, was very surprising but comforting as well. Another part of the interview that I found interesting was when the interviewer asked the son what he liked to do. Just because this boy wants to dress up, doesn't mean he isn't any less of a guy. True, it isn't a norm for a boy to dress like a girl, but I think it is becoming more accepted in society now. The son still likes to play basketball, and I was glad that they showed that he still liked "guy" things too, because I feel like when people hear about this story they automatically assume something is wrong with this boy. I am really glad that this book was published and the parents were open to getting interviewed, because I think this is an issue that is starting to arise in our society. Not necessarily boys dressing up as girls, but how men might do more feminist things (or vice versa) and how society should start to accept it. I know this can be a controversy issue, but maybe they don't have to even accept it, but understand that their way isn't the ONLY right way to do things. But I found this interview interesting in those ways, and hope that boy has a great rest of his life, which I am sure will happen, because the school and his parents are supporting him.

Good Girls Vs. Evil Girls

Last week in class we watched Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, comparing the evil step mother with Snow White. When we see the evil step mother, we noticed that she was more aggressive when talking with people, but was still beautiful in her own way. Also, she was dressed in dark clothing, and none of her body is showing so you can't see any of her figure. Her lips are bright red and match her red nail polish. Her voice was lower than normal, which is like giving her male attributes. As well, she is more mean and hurtful, and her aggression is put towards getting her own way. The evil step mother's plan is to hurt Snow White, which just shows another attribute she has, that she is mean to children, which women are suppose to love children. The evil step mother seems to describe what happens when women get too much power, or don't follow in her place in society. This movie seems to try and tear mothers and daughters apart, because the mother doesn't like the daughter. Apparently in the real story of Snow White, the evil step mother was actually Snow White's real mother, so the fact that in the movie it was changed, makes people wonder if they changed it because of the relationship aspect. In other young kids movies, there is an evil step mother as well, that treats one daughter worse than everyone else. Compared to her evil step mother, Snow White seems to symbolize what women should act like. She has a higher and sweeter voice, and doesn't look as scary as her evil step mother does. She never fights back, and apologizes for any trouble she has caused even if she wasn't the one who started it. Seeing the differences between these two characters in the movie, puts the movie in a whole new light. When you are young, you just see one of the women are bad, and Snow White is the good vulnerable one. but now looking at it in a different perspective, make the movie different. We also watched other clips of movies that portrayed women in different ways too. And now whenever I watch television, or a movie, I look to see how the women are shown, good or bad, or what language is used to describe the women.

To Be A Virgin Or To Not Be A Virgin, That Is The Question.

Being a virgin... being a slut, which is worse? Or which is better? Used to be that being a virgin was better, but now it seems the time have changed, and girls need to be both a virgin a and a slut. That seems crazy.. because how can we be both, without crossing the line? We could put on make up, and wear cute clothes that show off our bodies, but then if we attract multiple guys, we cannot be seen with all of them, especially making out with them. Some girls like to have all the options of having these guys around her, and then there are other girls who get all dressed up, gets a guy, and then doesn't want him. What should she do then? Women seem to get blamed for sending mixed messages in these instances of what types of clothing we wear. No girl wants to be considered a slut, so we try and be careful not to be with too many guys. And there are different types of sluts, like ones who have sex with all the guys, or make-out sluts. One of the guys in class seemed to think that a make-out slut is worse. When asking one of my friends, he thought the slut who has sex with all the guys was worse, but then when I told him that the make-out girl was a big tease, he thought about it again. And then decided the make-out girl was worse. We also talked about virginity.. and what are women really losing when she says she's lost her virginity. So what are we losing? Someone brought up in class that the we as women lose our commodity, because we have been "used". Is it really bad that because we lost our virginity we aren't as good because we had sex already? And another interesting fact is the guy takes our virginity away, women never take men's away. Another thing I realized is that it seems losing your virginity has changed over time. Years ago it was a big deal to lose one's virginity, and to some people, it is still a big deal, but I feel like many people don't care as much about it. And I think that is because different views and changes in generations. It seems like couples used to wait until marriage or until they are older to have sex, but now having sex is becoming more and more common, especially for the younger population.

What Does A Girl Want?

What A Girl Wants....besides being a movie title, it is a question that has any answers to it. I think what a girl wants most is for her life to be happy and filled with as many adventures, and successes as possible, and also finding a partner who will care for her. But when watching the movie these girls just want to be liked and have a life without worrying about how they have to look to be treated well. These girls were from ages nine to sixteen an hearing all the different answers they gave to answers about school and the media was very interesting to hear. The nine and ten year olds seemed to be somewhat more influenced by the media and wanting whatever society shows women should be like while the older girls realized that no matter what society shows how womb should  be that they won't be like that but that's alright. Just because a girl isn't tall an skinny doesn't mean she won't have a good life. Something one of the girls said on the movie, I thought was surprising because it was so true. Media influences our world a lot but the girl beings up that the only reason media continues to show stuff like this is because we like it. It was amazing how different the answers were of the younger girls versus the older girls. One of the questions brought up was about sex and it was a ten year old who answered the question. I remember her saying that she didn't think she would have to sort about sex until she was twelve or thirteen. Upon hearing this I thought about when I was twelve years old and I wasn't even close to thinking about sex yet. Possibly my friends and I were talking about what boys we thought were cute and liked but nothing past that. So the fact that sex is starting to be an issue at a younger age is crazy. Another one of the girls had mentioned how at a certain age since it was the cool thing to do, girls like her would have sex just so they wouldn't be left out and be considered cool. I know being cool is a big issue but something that was once thought of something so special is now a normal thing to do. It is very interesting to see how time has changed the perspectives of differed issues and it will be interesting to see where it takes us in the future. And then what does this mean for parents? How can a parent teach about sex if the perspective of it has changed so much since they were children? It will be something that I am curious about and hope to observe in the future.

Masculinity And Love?

     Today in class we talked about masculinity, and then we also addressed that the strongest emotion is love. One thing I never really thought much about was how males are always having to prove to everyone else how masculine they actually are. Everyday they are presented with situations that if they say something wrong, or act sensitive could end in them being teased, or thought less of than before. In certain cultures, the boys have a "right of passage" ceremony to become men, whether it be killing something or having to complete a mission to prove how masculine they are. What happens if part of what makes these men so manly is stripped from them? 

     Concussions are a huge issue now in football, with this year being the roughest season so far, with so many people getting injured. I remember one guy in class saying that he knew someone who got a concussion, and it was so bad that he can't play football now. Football was a huge part of this guy, as well as many other men out there... so what happens when an injury takes them out of such a big aspect of their life, and masculinity? This brings me to another point; men tend to avoid going to the doctor. Because men do this, they have a shorter life expectancy than women do. Men know that if they get injured, it could cost them their athletic career, so why go to the doctor? Men who have to go to the doctor seem to be somewhat looked down upon....they aren't tough enough to handle being injured and pulling throughout. When I think about it, I realize how true it is. My dad has gotten badly injured before, and didn't complain about it, and just kept on working. Later on, he bandaged up his leg, where he got cut, and that was that. 

     After talking about masculinity for a while, the topic was switched to what is the powerful emotion? At first I thought it was anger... which others did too, but it also makes sense that Love is the most powerful emotion. And how love can trigger many other emotions, including anger. We see all the time how women show their love, to their friends, their family, and companion, but it is much different than with men. Men are taught not to show most of their emotions as kids, and so as adults they don't, especially love. They must pretend not to show that they can love, because showing love is more of a feminine attribute....and men can't be seen with having feminine attributes.

Boys Don't Cry

I have come to the conclusion that I should read the whole book of Full Frontal Feminism, because the chapters we have read out of this book so far have all been interesting in their own way. This is the first chapter we have read that deals with males and masculinity. One of the sections in this chapter that caught my attention was the one that is titled Men Should Act Like Men. In this section it talks about a commercial for Milwaukee's Best beer, showing three guys who are digging a ditch when a bee comes by, and one of the men tries to wave the bee away while screaming "like a girl". His friends look at him in a strange way, and then a huge can of Milwaukee's Best falls from the sky crushing the screaming guy. During this, a voice says "Men should act like men." So this commerical tells men that they shouldn't act like girls, and also that they need to act like men, or bad things will happen to them. After reading this, it reminded me of another commercial that I saw, that happened to have the same concept but for a different product. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjuXbYW6KmE < This commercial is for snickers and was shown during the Superbowl of 2007. Both of the men start eating the snickers, and then they kiss... leading to them to have to "act like a man" which meant pain, or pulling their chest hairs out. This commercial seems to address gay men, more than being like women, saying its wrong for men to kiss. This is anti-gay, and shows what real men should or shouldn't do. Another section that interested me was Feminist Phobia. The author describes how she taught an Introduction to Feminisms course where this one guy wasn't a fan of the class... at all. He did everything he could to make her life miserable and prove her wrong in everything she said. And soon she figured out that the guy like many other men was in fear of feminism. So they acted out and against everything because they didn't know what else to do, or how else to express themselves. And then on the other hand there are many men who also want to support feminists called pro-feminists, so its funny how widely ranged men can be on the feminism subject.

Tough Guise

First impressions....if a girl sees a guy walking down the street, she might look at the clothes he is wearing and judge him from that, or whether he is good looking or not. Or when a girl meets a guy for the first time, they think is he good looking, is he fit, are his clothes nice, or does he look athletic? All of these questions are thought about when meeting a guy, whether a girl means to or not. If a guy wants to impress a girl, or get to know a girl better, then he is more pron to show off his good looks. Tough Guise made me think about this more after seeing it. One of the first examples the movie gave about men masking masculinity was from the Wizard of Oz. Where the wizard has this deep voice, and is suppose to be intimidating, but when Dorothy and the others look behind the mask, they find a man, who isn't like the intimidating wizard at all. This scene brought a lot of controversy at the time, because of it challenging masculinity. Tough Guise was trying to show how men shouldn't always be connected with violence, and also how many men are hiding behind this disguise of what a man should act and look like. They are hiding because from a very young age these boys were taught to only show certain parts of themselves to society, or else they would be called names, challenging their masculinity. These young boys are shown big muscles, and because they have seen those images so much, the boys want to have those big muscles. The bigger a boy is, the more respect they will get. So if all these boys/men are striving for the same characteristics, then what happens to their individuality? I agree that a lot of women want to be with men who have good, "nice fit" looking bodies, but that isn't all women want. But men can't show emotion, and have to hide behind this appearance of looking tough, and having control of all around them. So, unless a women really gets to know a man, then they all look the same. Men tend to be more violent and this seems to happen when their power or control is being challenged. In a relationship, if the woman is out of line, or starts to gain too much power, the man might beat her. All the movies, sports, and video games that have come out, all show men being violent in them, and that being acceptable. Even in situations about being gay, a lot of gay men are beaten, or killed because they are different, and this could be because the straight men fear what will happen if they accepted the gay men. I know now, things are different then years ago, but there are still men, (and women) who have a hard time accepting gay or lesbians. In the movie, it said that there was a lot of anti-gay violence, partly because  "real" men can kill, when something challenges their masculinity. I know all the time people say women have a hard life, because we are trying to gain more equal rights, and such, but we never think about how life can be difficult for men too. They have to watch everything they do, and keep their appearance up so society won't judge them. In some ways, I think this movie has a point, that men tend to mask who they really are. I am friends with a lot of guys, some better than others, and those who I know better, I can see a difference in how they act with me, and then around my other friends, or even new people they meet. It might not be a huge difference, but there is some, especially with what they are willing to share with me. I enjoyed this movie, and I hope if we don't finish it in class, I can watch it again in the future.

Law And Order?

Last week in class, it was brought up that Law and Order has many cases that deal with Freudian theories. I have watched many of the Law and Order's shows and never once did it cross my mind to think more about the situation and see what the producers might have wanted to secretly hide, or portray through their shows. It all goes back to that mentality that men should always be in control of women, and if for some reason women gain too much power.. well then she goes out of control. Who knew some much could be found in a crime scene show. It really makes me think more about everything around me. Now when I watch television hows, I try to look at everything in the background of a scene, because "everything is put there for a reason" as Sarah Worely reminds me in my Message Analysis class. I am very glad that my classes go together really well, because it makes me see ads, and television shows, and articles in different perspectives that I would have been oblivious to beforehand. Back to the Law and Order show, there have been cases such as two girls who work together to kill the popular girl in their grade. They did this for many reasons, one being that the girl had too much power, and the other girls didn't like it. The "alpha girl" had too much power, was richer, and got anything she wanted, which isn't good, so she had to be stopped. And so the other two girls took over and "took care of the problem" by killing this girl. Because these girls wanted the power, they got psychotic and did crazy things. Or another example is a woman rapist who has too much power, and because of this power, she isn't the typical woman who is a mother, but one who is crazy, doing horrible stuff. I find it very fun to analyze ads or television shows now, because I know more of what to look for. Although, at the same time, this does mean that I tend to not pay attention to the actual movie and annoy my friends with pointing out things, ruining the movie for them. But I am glad I can look at these things and not get sucked in as much as I would have if I didn't know these things.

Changes Over Time

During class on Thursday, we were put into groups to discuss certain parts of our reading assignment. My group talked about the anthropology part, and I found how our main topic of discussion really effects the outcome of future generations. Many people lived together, as a whole unit, having equal roles, for the most part, because all roles were important. Food was retrieved by the men, and while women stayed close to the home, taking care of the children as well as tending to some of the farming chores. This seemed like a good way of living, it was much like a hunter/gather style of living. Then when the concept of owning property came to be, things changed. Owning property was a big deal, because the parents wanted to pass their land down to their own kin, and not have other families children own the land. Along with owning property, brought about more tension in the "whole unit." It wasn't everyone helping everyone else anymore, it was everyone for themselves now. It's amazing what small changes can be put on a group, and how the dynamic changes so much. This kind of reminds me of when a third grade teacher decided to split her third graders into two groups, a group of blue eyes and brown eyes. This was to show the third graders about discrimination and racism, but it kind of has the same outcome. The third graders really started to turn against each other, and here the people are starting to turn against each other in the way that only their children can own their land. I am sure there are similar to this one as well, but as I said before, I found it interesting how much a difference can effect a group of people.

Pop Culture Gone Wild

I have been kind of behind on my reading, so I just got the chance to finish the reading on Pop Culture Gone Wild, and I really enjoyed it. I noticed that it is from Full Frontal Feminism, which is part of what we read before. The reading had some very interesting facts in it, that I would have never known if I hadn't read this book. For instance, Target was recently blasted for selling padded bras meant for six-year old girls. I was shocked when I first read this fact. I had to reread it because I didn't believe it at first. I know that as time goes on, that society seems to be aiming messages about sexuality earlier and earlier in girls, but I didn't think that they would be selling padded bras to six year old girls. When I was growing up in school, I didn't really pay much attention to my under garments as much as I do now, which still isn't a big amount. I really didn't like the normal bras, I enjoyed sports bras more. (Sorry if this is too much information.) My point is that, I don't know what six-year old girls would need a padded bra for, since they haven't even developed much yet. And how can the manufacturer think that people would buy padded bras for their young children? This reminds me of beauty pageants for young girls. These young girls are dressed up in make up, their hair are all done up nicely, and they have to be fit so they look beautiful. I personally don't mind pageants for older woman, although I don't really watch much pageants. But for small girls who still need to explore in life, I feel that these girls will be more prone to care A LOT about their bodies, and not be happy later in life. Society now, does put women in a box, which seems to always be brought up. "women seem to be confronted with too few choices and too many wagging fingers" This is true, because every thing that we do, we are being judged by society. The reading also brushes on "being a lesbian is totally acceptable -- so long as there's a man around to watch it-- and you're young and "hot" of course." As long as we please the men, it's fine for us to like women. I think it's interesting how we tend to have to do things just to make the men happy. From how the author puts it, it is almost that women can't think for themselves, and whatever men want, we will do because we want to be with a man. I am glad we are able to read this stuff, but sometimes its difficult because it seems so demoralizing to women.

Biology About Gender Differences

The speaker today was very informative and taught me a lot that I didn't know before. Some of the facts that are supported by scientific evidence are amazing. The things he talked about isn't a big topic to talk about normally, so hearing about it, made me realize how "uninformed" I am about things. I just go on with my life thinking what I learn in class is all I need to know, but really there is so much in this world to know, waiting to be talked about. I thought it was very interesting to find out about the hip to waist ratio.  The speaker said that what men look for in a women is youth, beauty, and fecundity, and that men tend to like different women in different stages of their life. When a man is thinking about just hooking up, they tend to lean towards a skinny girl, like the one society shows as the "beautiful" girl. And then later in life, when the men are seriously thinking about getting married, they tend to lean towards the leaner, but slim women. When thinking about this, that does make sense to me. If a guy wants to hook up, they aren't going to put much effort into finding a girl that is as caring or sympathetic as if he was going to marry her. So this leads to the "competition" of guys trying to see who can get the "hottest" girl. Another fact that goes along with that is women who store more fat in their hips tend to produce smarter offspring. This is because there is high Omega 3 in the hip fat, but if a women has more belly fat, that could be potentially bad for her offspring. Another one of his many topics that we covered, is that women are really picky when trying to find a guy to be in a relationship with, as compared to the guys, who aren't as picky, and can easily do what they please, in a way, because in the long term, they aren't effected by pregnancy. Thinking about how women are picky when finding a partner has been an eye opener for me, because of how true it is. My roommate sometimes creates a list of what traits her boyfriend will need. And of course many of us to that, maybe not to the extent that lists need to be made, but when finding a guy, a guy could be more attractive because he plays an instrument, or sings. Even myself, when thinking about it, I know what type of guy would interested me more than one who might turn me off with something he says. I find it interesting how so many tests have been made to give us facts about topics like these. And I hope the research continues because it is such an interesting topic that many people should know about.

What Makes A Women Beautiful?

Last Thursday, it was brought up in class how different pant sizes are for women and how much easier it is to buy pants for guys, because all they have to do is measure their waist and length of their leg. Differently, when women shop for jeans, it could be anything from 00 to 14, 16, I am not even sure how big it goes up to, but its so crazy the amount of different sizes women have to choose from, in my opinion. Yes, like many of the other women in the world, I am really happy when I can fit into pants that are size 2, because I feel like I am fitting in. But now thinking about it, I am fitting into what society wants to me be. If the sizes would remain the same from store to store, I don't think I would mind that much, but the sizes are all over the place. A size 2 in one store could be a size 6 or 8 in another one. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy going shopping, but I wish sometimes I could do my shopping faster, as the guys can do, by just finding my size and that will be right for all the other pants I want (or skirts or shorts). The women are brought up to want to aim for the perfect body. Which, what we figured out in one of the first days of classes was, being tall, having a slim waist, big boobs and butt, and long hair. And so no matter if where we come from in the world, or at least in the United States, many of us strive for those attributes (or some of them) no matter what we look like. Our aim is to fit into those small sizes of pants, or other clothing so we can "prove" to the world how good we look. But now looking back many years ago, the "hot and sexy" women weren't these small skinny sizes that they are now. Marylin Monroe, wasn't a 00, or 2 size, and she was still known to be that ideal women. So what happened? Who decided that what a women should look like to change so drastically? Knowing that I will never be tall used to bother me a lot, because everyone always seems to be towering over me, but I have learned to love how I am. That doesn't mean that I still try and stay fit, and do want to have a "nice body" so to say, but I know that having a size 00 won't decide if I am beautiful or not. Who I am decides that, and I am happy that I have realized that, and glad that I have stopped trying to be who I wasn't.

Who decides?

In class we have been talking about how society decides how we should act and puts us in certain boxes according to our sexes. We also discussed for a bit of who decides what gender neutral is because men or women can have different characteristics about themselves that don't have to be specifically in the "boxes" that society puts us in. And as our conversation went on, it got me thinking, especially when we brought up male nurses. This is unusual for society because society always sees nurses as being women, so the fact that there can be male nurses is not the norm. True, whenever someone says nurse, I automatically think of a woman doing that job, but if it is a male, I personally don't have a problem with that. But then there are questions that go along with the male nurse occupation. Did he only become a nurse because he wasn't good enough to become a doctor? Society has such a huge impact on us, and I don't think we realize how much it does until we truly think about these certain situations for ourselves. Then there is the twist that if you become a male nurse, he still gets promoted faster and paid more than women nurses. So, just because a male is now in a woman's position it seems like society is trying to make the situation better for him by making the job more appealing. Who knows. But I thought that was really interesting, because our roles or jobs in society are so separated that if one gender changes their jobs or role, then there are questions and gossip arises about that person. Topics like that are so interesting to me, because it helps me become more aware of my surroundings.

Feminism Still Alive?

It's funny how related all of my classes seem to be this year, my Introduction to Human Communications, and my Message Analysis class, I understand because they are both communication classes, but this class also goes along with those two classes very well too. Rhetoric is a word that I have seen all the time, and having the Introduction to Communication right before Gender and Conflict is great, in my opinion, because I am all focused on how best to communicate or how different things are interpreted, and then seeing how gender fits in along with how different things are interpreted. Another word that keeps coming up in my readings, and discussions is Feminism. Talking about how it seems to be an effort that has fallen apart, since women have become more equal to men compared to how things were years ago. But it is also said, that even though it is known that there isn't a group of feminists, women are always compared to being feminists. If something happens then, it is because of the feminists. One of the readings for Tuesday is about Feminism, and there it is brought up once again. This one reading tells how the movement of Feminism has stopped ever since women got to be in the workforce and also got to choose whether to stay home or not. And here, Bell tells us to take up arms once again, join hands and start the feminist movement once again. Because we, as in women, deserve more than what we have. Even though we have come so far, we still have so far to go, so to say. So this started me thinking about what I could possibly to to help the feminist movement. And I know I don't want to do anything on a big scale, but I can do small things such as trying to stop my guy friends stop putting down girls, even when telling jokes. I think I want to help the feminist movement, but at the same time its hard for me to think what I should do, because I am so used to the everyday put downs so to say, so I don't mind that much. I think taking this class, will allow me to explore what else I may be able to do, and see how feminist I actually am or would want to be.

Full Frontal Feminism

I just finished reading the chapter from Full Frontal Feminism, and loved it. Jessica Valenti's writing style is one that is really easy to relate to in my opinion, because it is like you are sitting there having a conversation with her instead of reading her writing. And she brings up many good points. I have heard of feminism and different meanings, but I don't think I ever put too much thought into whether I considered myself one. Even when reading it, I was questioning whether I thought myself as feminist or not. The Feminists Are Ugly section made me realize that many of us, women I mean, end up taking most of what we hear to heart. At least out of my friends this happens. If someone tells me that they like my hair, I will take pride in my hair each day. And the same goes for if someone says that I don't look good, I might go and try to make myself look better in someway. And then I continue to think about what that person said as time went on. But what I have realized over time, and even more so reading the chapter was that I should be happy with who I am and what I have. This chapter has made me more excited to continue and hear other people's opinions in class and learn more about how gender can cause conflict, even in places where I don't think they do.