Just Thinking.....

I am guessing almost no one reads my blog, so I am not as afraid to post this... but I always had this question at the back of my head. This is a little off topic about what we are talking about in class now, but I was always curious about this. So my question/ realization is this: There is now talk of a woman possibly in the future being president. This is a HUGE deal in the United States, but anywhere else in the world (for the most part), women have been president. Why is this?! And I had many guesses to why this may be, but I would like to ask someone who knows a lot about women studies, or some other subject that could help analyze this question. Women are capable of being president, so what is wrong with the United States? I just found this article about this question... http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/04/19/60minutes/rooney/main1513207.shtml < That was from a 60 minutes episode, and one of the things in the article talks about the population dealing with the reasoning behind not having a female as president. There are more women in the world than men... so he suggests that women aren't voting for women. I can see how this could be a good reasoning, but at the same time I disagree. There are many women who probably don't vote, and many in the world don't know a lot, or don't care enough about politics to vote. So then that already decreases the number of voters anyway. Although times now are changing, men have been the ones who were more educated, so very few women could vote... making the number of voters even lower. Of course now, more women have become educated and are becoming more part of the government, so I am sure that the time for a women president will come soon. But I just thought this was an interesting thing to think about. And I am glad to know that other people in the world have thought about it too!

Tan or White?!

Tan or white? This is a question some women ask themselves everyday. Women in the United States, who are white, want to be tan. Women in other countries around the world who are tan, or dark skinned want to be white. So here our world revolves around women not liking themselves. I do understand that as women, we like to be as beautiful as we can, putting make up on everyday and wearing nice clothes. But I never got the idea of tanning to look more tan. At the same time, since I was not born in the United States, and I am not white, I can't judge. I was born in Peru, so my skin is naturally tan. When I was younger, I didn't realize how "different" I was. I remember guys always asking, why are you so tan? And my explanation was that I was out in the sun all the time. It never occurred that being born in another country made my skin that way it was. As I grew older I learned how great my skin was. I love being tan.. and maybe part of that reason is because all of my friends strive to be as tan as I am. During the summer, the competition for all my "white" friends is to see who can get as tan as me. Being more tan is a big deal here, and I take for granted how great being tan is. Personally, I don't think much about my skin color, as you might have guessed from telling the story about when I was younger, not even realizing why my skin color was different. So when my friends all tell me, " I wish I was more tan", I hesitate because I don't know what to say. I tell them that they have great skin, but then they tell me how jealous they are of my skin. This came up in a conversation we had last week about people not feeling right in their own bodies. So here I am combining the need to be tan, and people not feeling comfortable in their own skin...that didn't mean to be a pun. On the other hand there are people who are darker skinned that strive to be white just like people from the United States. There is white cream that people can buy to make their skin whiter. This is because those people think white gets you more things, which is true in this society, but at the same time I feel bad that people have to resort to this. One student had said when she was in India, she saw this poor woman selling balloons, and once that woman got some money, instead of buying food, she bought whitening cream. This just shows how important it is to be white in the other countries. So my question to everyone, is why is it so hard for us to not like ourselves? I know there are some people who do love their skin, but a majority don't, and I feel that this should be changed. We don't want to all be the same person because what is the fun in that? We need to different, because that makes up who we are as a person. Now then there is also the aspect that white skinned people have more privileges, which makes my question hard, because all the darker skinned people want is to be more noticed, and live better. So my question also can't be answered. I personally love my skin, and don't want to change it. But my appreciation for my skin came over time, and I think if others learn to love themselves, that is a huge step towards a better future.

Latina TV

Today was a presentation about Culture and Media Culture, and for this we had to read different articles about different races, and how they are represented in culture. The first article was about the TV show Ugly Betty and Latina TV. The Ugly Betty series finale was this past April, which caused not only an end to a great show, but an end to a show with two Latinas as prominent roles. These days many of the main roles of TV shows are mainly "white people's" roles. There are shows and/or movies who have Latino or Latina/Hispanic people in it, but usually their characters are described as the stereotypical view of Latinos/as. These views are slutty, fierce, or spicy women. The ones who are able to steal the husbands away from the wives because of their looks. And Latina women are seen a lot for their bodies, because they are tan, and very curvy. One TV show that shows a Latina as a slutty role is Santana, in Glee. Santana is a cheerleader who is dating this tough "bad ass" guy, which really just means that she is having sex with him. Then there is Desperate Housewives, where there is Eva Longoria is married to a Hispanic/Latino male, but has affairs with other men when her husband isn't home. Now, this show is about women who have flings and affairs, so maybe she is a Latina/Hispanic woman in a white woman's world, doing all these things too. It could go both ways. That brings me to another topic that we talked about in class. When you see Latina/Hispanic women dating a guy, it is most likely a Hispanic/Latino man, when shown on television. But if a Hispanic/Latino male dates someone, it doesn't have to be in the same race, but can be other races. I thought that was really interesting to learn about. This is a side note, but I was born in Peru, and so I do look Latina. I have traveled to Spanish speaking countries, and many times when people see me they start talking to me in Spanish. I do understand some Spanish, but I am far from fluent, so when they find out that I don't speak Spanish they are surprised and then sometimes I feel like they are disappointed as well. I do want to learn Spanish well, and I am slowly in the process of doing so, but it was a different feeling that I had to deal with, because these could have been the people I grew up with. My mom always tells me that once I get into the "real" world that things might change for me because I am Latina. And when I was younger, I didn't understand what she meant, because I thought I was just like everyone else, with just more tan skin. But now I understand what she is saying. Because I am a Latina women, in some cases I might not have as many opportunities in places where people don't know me, because one look, and they will start making stereotypes. I think the Ugly Betty article was a great one to read because it showed how TV has started to change, but still limits certain races playing roles. Or if there are they go along with the stereotypes that the media has shown the public about those certain races.

Girls and Marriage

It is interesting to see on TV shows or movies how the girl is taken away so a suitable man can be chosen for her, or the parents just set up marriages for their daughters. I have seen this in two things just recently. I am a huge fan of Gilmore Girls. I love the tv show, but have just recently become a fan, as in the last two years. I have seen all the seasons a number of times now, and since recently I never realized what it would be like to be one of the friends of one of the main characters. One of the main characters, Rory, has a friend, Lane, who is Korean, and Lane's mother is always setting her up on dates for possibly future boyfriends/husbands. Lane is a good daughter, and respects her mother's Korean ways, but wants to be able to pick her own boyfriends and be in a rock band, which would be unacceptable, so she hides who she really wants to be. She had no choice on who she could be with, because her future boyfriend/husband had to be a "future doctor. " It was really stressed in her family that she would only be with one guy for the rest of her life. Her mother was only with her father, and waited to have sex until marriage, and even then it was said she didn't do it much after that. I know that this is a different culture, but it was interesting to me that this TV show showed this, in a time where times have changed. I am glad they did because it is another perspective that girls can see. I know a lot of girls or women can't imagine what it is like to be forced to marry someone, because (especially now) women are allowed to be with whomever they want. They can choose whether they want to be married, or just focus on themselves. A movie that goes along with this is Shrek. I know it is a young children's movie, but I was watching it while babysitting and it showed how the girl has to wait for her Prince Charming to come and rescue her, and that will be the one whom she will marry. And so this girl has to wait in a building away from everyone else, with a dragon guarding her, so that her Prince Charming will come and save her. It seems in a way that girls should only wait for that one guy that they will spend the rest of their lives with. And it is true that girls, wait for that one guy, but they must have experiences before they meet that guy. It is good to have other relationships to know what you like and what you don't like. I know that arranged marriages were common years ago, but I couldn't imagine being put with a man, who I don't like, and he might not like me either. We would have to get married and act like we like each other, and I am sure after a while, we would get to like each other more but that initial shock of having to be with someone with the rest of your life that you have no connection with is scary. So I just thought I would point out those observations I had on those two TV shows/movies. And how we can see that it is still taught that girls should wait for that one person to be with for the rest of their lives, even though it seems that doing that is getting more rare, at least in the United States.

Racism

Racism has been around forever, and will continue to be a part of our everyday lives no matter what. People may think that they aren't racist, but everyone is. As bad as that sounds, we all are, because we all have been persuaded by the media, and our parents. It is true that some people may be less racist than others, but no one person can say that they aren't racist. I remember during the Soap Box Speeches that was weeks ago, one of my friends went up and talked about racism. She is African American and opened with, "Today I found out that I was racist." At first I laughed at that, but soon realized that it was true. She explained that because it was always told that white people were racist against black people, it never crossed her mind that things could go the reverse way as well. She had made a white person joke one day, and realized that that was racist. I know for myself, I try to be careful with what I say out loud, but I catch myself about to say or thinking something racist and realizing how bad that is. It is true that some things aren't as bad as others, but it is still racism. The class before Thanksgiving, we talked about racism and oppression. Over the years we, as a country have become more accepting of different races. Even when talking about racism I am guessing that most people think of African Americans, because of the Civil War and slavery. We forget that there are other races in which we can be racist of as well. But since the civil war was more recent, there is still outburst of racism against African Americans in the South states. Because the South was where most of the slavery was held, because the North made them get rid of slavery, they still hold grudges against the Blacks. Now I don't believe there is a lot of places that still segregate, but I am sure there are towns that blacks would be best to stay away from. In an article we were given in class from the New York Times, called Our Racist, Sexist Selves, it talked about this man finding out he was racist. There was a test that a person could take in which a person encounters a series of black or white men, holding guns or cellphones. The person's job is to shoot the gunmen and holster their gun for others. The outcome for this man was that he shot armed blacks in an average that was slightly faster than he shot the armed whites. THis example shows that even when we least expect it, everyone can be somewhat racists.

Roles in Relationships

Traditional vs. Egalitarian families. Years back, families were known as traditional families, but as time passed, they have evolved into egalitarian families, with some traditional influences. I think this is a great change for the society now, because women are allowed to do more things, such as getting an education, to finding a good paying job to support their families. The presentation said that about 71% of women work outside of the home now, which is a huge number from when women were only thought to be stay at home mothers. No matter how society has changed, it seems that the men want to still remain somewhat in charge. We got on the discussion of if the wife makes more money, what does that mean for the husband? Some men can accept that, and others won't hear of it because then they aren't the ones who are providing for their families. I remember someone saying in class that their mother made more money than her father, and the mother wouldn't tell her husband how much she made, because she knew it would upset her husband. So it seems in some instances the man might feel ashamed if they aren't the dominant provider of the family. I never thought about this too much in depth before, but looking at my family, my mother was the main provider for a number of years. She worked in NYC, and would stay down there half a week, so my dad was the stay at home dad taking care of my brother and I. I guess I knew this was somewhat different, but I never thought that much of it. And in how things turned out, I am glad that for most of my life that my father was around. Not because I didn't like my mother, but it gave me the chance to be close with my father as well. If my mother hadn't been away, I think it would be harder for me to share some things with my father that I do now, or things we do together. It was a great relationship builder for me. This is not to say that I don't have a great relationship with my mother. I do, she has now retired and is at the house all the time, still making some money, but my father now has a job too. I never thought to ask my father how he felt about my mother going out and making the money for the household, but I think having this "switch" of roles, was a benefit for all of us, especially my brother and I. My father seems very happy to be working and earning money for our family now, and with his working I don't get to see him as much, but the way I was brought up, I wouldn't have it any other way. I got the best of both worlds. So back to the traditional versus egalitarian families, mine is definitely egalitarian. Both of my parents cook, and clean. My mother does most of the cleaning in the house, and my dad does most the outside work, but they also do work inside or out together, so there is some traditional influences.

The Curse

I think it's funny how many names or words are associated with a girl's period: "the curse", "it's her time of the month" , "I got a visit from Aunt Flo", etc. When the sex education group did their presentation, the movie that they showed was about a girl getting her period for the first time. She thought it was "the curse" and if I remember correctly wasn't that fond of it. But when she first told her mother about it, her mother was so happy for her. The daughter had now become a woman. Along with growing up, there were certain things that a girl was limited to when one had their period. This movie wasn't present day, but it was interesting to see what the teacher taught to the girls in class about their menstruation cycle. The teacher stressed how important it was for the girls to look their most attractive selves when having their period. And I think I also recall a girl asking if other people know when they are having their period. The answer was no. I disagreed with some of what the teacher said, but that's just my opinion. Anyway, so if the teacher said that no one knows when a girl is on their period, wouldn't people guess something happened for a week, that the girl is much more "attractive" than other weeks in the month? I would think so. So it seems that they do want the boys to know, possibly, that the girls are having their period, because why would they tell the girls to look more attractive when they have it? Another thing I thought was funny, especially compared to now was a sign the teacher had, about the "Do's and Do Moderately During Menstruation". The things to do are showering or bathe, wash hair, swim, dance and picnic, and the things you can do moderately included skating, horseback riding, fast games, and square dancing. I think these are really funny because of what we can do now. I guess I understand that they didn't want anything to get too out of hand, or push anything, but you can dance, just not square dance? Their choices of what they should do moderately compared to what they are allowed to do are interesting choices. Another thing that was said in the movie was that a girl getting her first period is the first step of becoming a mother. That is such a huge statement, saying that girls are only meant to grow up to become mothers, nothing else. I know that this was 40 or some years old, so that was how women were portrayed, but in today's society, that would be a crazy statement to hear. Today, I am glad, that women have the right to get an education, and work just like men. And as much as menstruation cycle can not be fun, it's must happen. So hopefully it won't be a curse to all, just a reminder that we are growing up.