What Does A Girl Want?

What A Girl Wants....besides being a movie title, it is a question that has any answers to it. I think what a girl wants most is for her life to be happy and filled with as many adventures, and successes as possible, and also finding a partner who will care for her. But when watching the movie these girls just want to be liked and have a life without worrying about how they have to look to be treated well. These girls were from ages nine to sixteen an hearing all the different answers they gave to answers about school and the media was very interesting to hear. The nine and ten year olds seemed to be somewhat more influenced by the media and wanting whatever society shows women should be like while the older girls realized that no matter what society shows how womb should  be that they won't be like that but that's alright. Just because a girl isn't tall an skinny doesn't mean she won't have a good life. Something one of the girls said on the movie, I thought was surprising because it was so true. Media influences our world a lot but the girl beings up that the only reason media continues to show stuff like this is because we like it. It was amazing how different the answers were of the younger girls versus the older girls. One of the questions brought up was about sex and it was a ten year old who answered the question. I remember her saying that she didn't think she would have to sort about sex until she was twelve or thirteen. Upon hearing this I thought about when I was twelve years old and I wasn't even close to thinking about sex yet. Possibly my friends and I were talking about what boys we thought were cute and liked but nothing past that. So the fact that sex is starting to be an issue at a younger age is crazy. Another one of the girls had mentioned how at a certain age since it was the cool thing to do, girls like her would have sex just so they wouldn't be left out and be considered cool. I know being cool is a big issue but something that was once thought of something so special is now a normal thing to do. It is very interesting to see how time has changed the perspectives of differed issues and it will be interesting to see where it takes us in the future. And then what does this mean for parents? How can a parent teach about sex if the perspective of it has changed so much since they were children? It will be something that I am curious about and hope to observe in the future.

Masculinity And Love?

     Today in class we talked about masculinity, and then we also addressed that the strongest emotion is love. One thing I never really thought much about was how males are always having to prove to everyone else how masculine they actually are. Everyday they are presented with situations that if they say something wrong, or act sensitive could end in them being teased, or thought less of than before. In certain cultures, the boys have a "right of passage" ceremony to become men, whether it be killing something or having to complete a mission to prove how masculine they are. What happens if part of what makes these men so manly is stripped from them? 

     Concussions are a huge issue now in football, with this year being the roughest season so far, with so many people getting injured. I remember one guy in class saying that he knew someone who got a concussion, and it was so bad that he can't play football now. Football was a huge part of this guy, as well as many other men out there... so what happens when an injury takes them out of such a big aspect of their life, and masculinity? This brings me to another point; men tend to avoid going to the doctor. Because men do this, they have a shorter life expectancy than women do. Men know that if they get injured, it could cost them their athletic career, so why go to the doctor? Men who have to go to the doctor seem to be somewhat looked down upon....they aren't tough enough to handle being injured and pulling throughout. When I think about it, I realize how true it is. My dad has gotten badly injured before, and didn't complain about it, and just kept on working. Later on, he bandaged up his leg, where he got cut, and that was that. 

     After talking about masculinity for a while, the topic was switched to what is the powerful emotion? At first I thought it was anger... which others did too, but it also makes sense that Love is the most powerful emotion. And how love can trigger many other emotions, including anger. We see all the time how women show their love, to their friends, their family, and companion, but it is much different than with men. Men are taught not to show most of their emotions as kids, and so as adults they don't, especially love. They must pretend not to show that they can love, because showing love is more of a feminine attribute....and men can't be seen with having feminine attributes.

Boys Don't Cry

I have come to the conclusion that I should read the whole book of Full Frontal Feminism, because the chapters we have read out of this book so far have all been interesting in their own way. This is the first chapter we have read that deals with males and masculinity. One of the sections in this chapter that caught my attention was the one that is titled Men Should Act Like Men. In this section it talks about a commercial for Milwaukee's Best beer, showing three guys who are digging a ditch when a bee comes by, and one of the men tries to wave the bee away while screaming "like a girl". His friends look at him in a strange way, and then a huge can of Milwaukee's Best falls from the sky crushing the screaming guy. During this, a voice says "Men should act like men." So this commerical tells men that they shouldn't act like girls, and also that they need to act like men, or bad things will happen to them. After reading this, it reminded me of another commercial that I saw, that happened to have the same concept but for a different product. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjuXbYW6KmE < This commercial is for snickers and was shown during the Superbowl of 2007. Both of the men start eating the snickers, and then they kiss... leading to them to have to "act like a man" which meant pain, or pulling their chest hairs out. This commercial seems to address gay men, more than being like women, saying its wrong for men to kiss. This is anti-gay, and shows what real men should or shouldn't do. Another section that interested me was Feminist Phobia. The author describes how she taught an Introduction to Feminisms course where this one guy wasn't a fan of the class... at all. He did everything he could to make her life miserable and prove her wrong in everything she said. And soon she figured out that the guy like many other men was in fear of feminism. So they acted out and against everything because they didn't know what else to do, or how else to express themselves. And then on the other hand there are many men who also want to support feminists called pro-feminists, so its funny how widely ranged men can be on the feminism subject.

Tough Guise

First impressions....if a girl sees a guy walking down the street, she might look at the clothes he is wearing and judge him from that, or whether he is good looking or not. Or when a girl meets a guy for the first time, they think is he good looking, is he fit, are his clothes nice, or does he look athletic? All of these questions are thought about when meeting a guy, whether a girl means to or not. If a guy wants to impress a girl, or get to know a girl better, then he is more pron to show off his good looks. Tough Guise made me think about this more after seeing it. One of the first examples the movie gave about men masking masculinity was from the Wizard of Oz. Where the wizard has this deep voice, and is suppose to be intimidating, but when Dorothy and the others look behind the mask, they find a man, who isn't like the intimidating wizard at all. This scene brought a lot of controversy at the time, because of it challenging masculinity. Tough Guise was trying to show how men shouldn't always be connected with violence, and also how many men are hiding behind this disguise of what a man should act and look like. They are hiding because from a very young age these boys were taught to only show certain parts of themselves to society, or else they would be called names, challenging their masculinity. These young boys are shown big muscles, and because they have seen those images so much, the boys want to have those big muscles. The bigger a boy is, the more respect they will get. So if all these boys/men are striving for the same characteristics, then what happens to their individuality? I agree that a lot of women want to be with men who have good, "nice fit" looking bodies, but that isn't all women want. But men can't show emotion, and have to hide behind this appearance of looking tough, and having control of all around them. So, unless a women really gets to know a man, then they all look the same. Men tend to be more violent and this seems to happen when their power or control is being challenged. In a relationship, if the woman is out of line, or starts to gain too much power, the man might beat her. All the movies, sports, and video games that have come out, all show men being violent in them, and that being acceptable. Even in situations about being gay, a lot of gay men are beaten, or killed because they are different, and this could be because the straight men fear what will happen if they accepted the gay men. I know now, things are different then years ago, but there are still men, (and women) who have a hard time accepting gay or lesbians. In the movie, it said that there was a lot of anti-gay violence, partly because  "real" men can kill, when something challenges their masculinity. I know all the time people say women have a hard life, because we are trying to gain more equal rights, and such, but we never think about how life can be difficult for men too. They have to watch everything they do, and keep their appearance up so society won't judge them. In some ways, I think this movie has a point, that men tend to mask who they really are. I am friends with a lot of guys, some better than others, and those who I know better, I can see a difference in how they act with me, and then around my other friends, or even new people they meet. It might not be a huge difference, but there is some, especially with what they are willing to share with me. I enjoyed this movie, and I hope if we don't finish it in class, I can watch it again in the future.

Law And Order?

Last week in class, it was brought up that Law and Order has many cases that deal with Freudian theories. I have watched many of the Law and Order's shows and never once did it cross my mind to think more about the situation and see what the producers might have wanted to secretly hide, or portray through their shows. It all goes back to that mentality that men should always be in control of women, and if for some reason women gain too much power.. well then she goes out of control. Who knew some much could be found in a crime scene show. It really makes me think more about everything around me. Now when I watch television hows, I try to look at everything in the background of a scene, because "everything is put there for a reason" as Sarah Worely reminds me in my Message Analysis class. I am very glad that my classes go together really well, because it makes me see ads, and television shows, and articles in different perspectives that I would have been oblivious to beforehand. Back to the Law and Order show, there have been cases such as two girls who work together to kill the popular girl in their grade. They did this for many reasons, one being that the girl had too much power, and the other girls didn't like it. The "alpha girl" had too much power, was richer, and got anything she wanted, which isn't good, so she had to be stopped. And so the other two girls took over and "took care of the problem" by killing this girl. Because these girls wanted the power, they got psychotic and did crazy things. Or another example is a woman rapist who has too much power, and because of this power, she isn't the typical woman who is a mother, but one who is crazy, doing horrible stuff. I find it very fun to analyze ads or television shows now, because I know more of what to look for. Although, at the same time, this does mean that I tend to not pay attention to the actual movie and annoy my friends with pointing out things, ruining the movie for them. But I am glad I can look at these things and not get sucked in as much as I would have if I didn't know these things.

Changes Over Time

During class on Thursday, we were put into groups to discuss certain parts of our reading assignment. My group talked about the anthropology part, and I found how our main topic of discussion really effects the outcome of future generations. Many people lived together, as a whole unit, having equal roles, for the most part, because all roles were important. Food was retrieved by the men, and while women stayed close to the home, taking care of the children as well as tending to some of the farming chores. This seemed like a good way of living, it was much like a hunter/gather style of living. Then when the concept of owning property came to be, things changed. Owning property was a big deal, because the parents wanted to pass their land down to their own kin, and not have other families children own the land. Along with owning property, brought about more tension in the "whole unit." It wasn't everyone helping everyone else anymore, it was everyone for themselves now. It's amazing what small changes can be put on a group, and how the dynamic changes so much. This kind of reminds me of when a third grade teacher decided to split her third graders into two groups, a group of blue eyes and brown eyes. This was to show the third graders about discrimination and racism, but it kind of has the same outcome. The third graders really started to turn against each other, and here the people are starting to turn against each other in the way that only their children can own their land. I am sure there are similar to this one as well, but as I said before, I found it interesting how much a difference can effect a group of people.